Writing is one of the few ways I feel like I can communicate with accuracy. There is something about pen and paper or fingers delicately gliding over keys...or pounding depending on the mood. No words to stumble over or people to impress. No forced smiles, conversation, or empty words. Authenticity. Writing is a window into the mind, heart, and soul of a person. As of late, my writing has been confined to pen, paper, and my thoughts. That's usually the way I like to keep it, but I feel that it is about time that my blog gets a little attention.
The last couple of months have given me opportunity to learn, feel, and grow more than I have in quite a while. Each season of life contains tremendous opportunity to grow, reflect, and change. These months have taught and are continuing to teach me more things than I could possibly express through one blog, so I won't try to. I'll just give a brief glimpse of a couple lessons the Lord is graciously teaching me.
1) Take a good, long, unbiased look in the mirror.
James 1:22-25 "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does."
This one has been quite difficult, but beautiful at the same time. The Lord has been gently, graciously exfoliating my heart and revealing to me areas of sin, brokenness, and imperfection. He has allowed me to take a good look at where I've been, where I am, and where He is taking me. He's graciously allowed opportunity for unresolved brokenness to be revealed and healing to begin. He loves me too much to leave me where I'm at. I firmly believe that the more we acknowledge our personal imperfection, all the more beautiful the perfection, grace, and redeeming love Christ becomes. I have earned the title damned sinner, but through His grace and precious blood, I am a saint. Praise Him.
2) Don't conform to the beliefs and attitudes of the world or of those surrounding you. Think and believe for yourself.
Romans 12:2 "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect."
Being at a Christian university is such an incredible blessing and freedom, but it can also be easy to float along and exceedingly challenging and extremely lonely to personally grow and develop into everything that God has created you to be. I've been convicted of my own conformation in certain attitudes, actions, and expectations. This realization has triggered a desire to delve deeper into the Word for myself, examine my own beliefs, motivations, and attitudes, and reconstruct target areas of my life. It has been a struggle to step back and identify the stagnant areas of my life that have remained unchanging and undeveloped as a result of personal ignorance and sinful nature, but I am so thankful for the growth that is being derived from these enlightened areas.
3) Vulnerability is the currency of any relationship.
If you desire to have deep, meaningful relationship with God, friends, family, boyfriend/girlfriend, spouse, etc. vulnerability is required. Now don't get me wrong, I am definitely not saying that you should give everyone around you an access key to your inner person and heart. Your personal thoughts, beliefs, past, and heart are an incredibly precious entity and need to be guarded with wisdom. Although they are to be guarded, don't allow paralyzing fear of exposure and vulnerability rob the opportunity of relationships from you. Allow people who prove to be sincere, trustworthy, honest, have your best interest at heart, and are seeking Jesus with everything and above all else into your life. Humans were not created to do life alone. Any human relationship contains an element of risk, but without that risk you will never experience the joy and growth that these relationships can bring. Keep Jesus at the center and you can trust that if/when you do get hurt, He will catch you and work all things together for your good.
Romans 8:28 "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose."
Welp, I believe that's all for now, folks. Thanks for reading.