I thought that it was about time I wrote a blog. There has been so much going on lately. So many ups and downs. So much confu1sion and clarity. Many hard things and beautiful things. If I put the last 2 weeks in a blog, I think it would turn into more of a novel, so I'll spare you ;)
Where to start? Well, I'm here at school, so obviously I'm doing schoolwork. This semester is going to be my most difficult semester thus far. I'm taking 18 credit hours, have 3 weekly practicums, and 15 hours of education & psyc activities to fit in. On top of that, I'm still a Prayer Leader, which I absolutely LOVE, but that also takes time and dedication. This brings me to my first lesson.
1. The importance of detailed and achievable organization and time management.
Organization and time management is definitely not natural at all for me. I've always been the kind of "it'll be fine as long as it gets done sometime, but I'd rather go have fun right now" type. I'm learning that if I'm ever going to be an effective, productive teacher, friend, missionary, homemaker, and wife, that needs to change. Change is really hard, but it is so good. I'm becoming very close friends with my planner and sticky note system and although it is not my nature, I'm learning the benefits of a disciplined life. Among those benefits are better grades, less stress, more "free time" than I expected, more time for ministry, and just being proud of myself for finally sticking to a schedule/planner :)
2. Jesus is always, always enough and NEVER changes or fails. His presence commands our utmost worship.
This week was really hard. The beginning of the week, I was faced with some really hard things and was just really mad at God to be quite frank. I didn't understand why He lets things happen and why I was feeling so much anger and pain with a depth I haven't felt in years. Of course, being a stupid member of the human race, I decided I felt like subconsciously blaming everything on God. In my heart, I knew that I had no reason to play the blame game with God, but I did anyways. The first night of Spiritual Emphasis Week during worship, I did not have any desire to worship. God and I talk quite a bit, and I told Him, I'm angry at you and I don't feel like worshiping right now. BAMMMM. Then He spoke to me. Those piercing words of power and authority spoken with the gentleness of a kind father correcting His child. I sat down and started writing in my journal immediately. He told me He demanded worship. He is faithful, He is righteous, He is love, He is grace, He is mercy, He is truth, He is light, He is beauty, He is Creator, He is the Sustainer, He is the Deliver, He is the Healer. At His name, slaves are freed, captives are unchained, and the promises are fulfilled. HE NEVER CHANGES. His Holy presence demands reverence, worship, and awe. No matter what I feel like that day, He never changes and He deserves my utmost praise and worship.
3. Be bold, yo.
When is the last time that you did something that you knew God called you to and regretted it? Still thinking? I've concluded never. Sure, following God's lead and stepping out of your comfort zone can be really scary at first, but I've never had a time in my life that I've wished I hadn't after the fact. By being bold and allowing God to empower you to do things you never thought you were capable of, you can experience His power and the reality of God on a whole new level. When you surrender an area of your life to Him, you will be amazed at what He can accomplish through. The past couple of weeks have been scary in that area. He's asked me to do some really uncomfortable things that I would much rather ignore. I'm so glad that I didn't. Even though it has been a scary journey continuing to learn how to be bold and willing to follow His callings and promptings, it has been so amazing. There is nothing comparable to being used by Him.
4. Singleness is a wonderful, purposeful, awesome season.
I could go on and on about this one. It is not a recently learned lesson, but it has been reaffirmed that past few weeks. I believe that this season as a single young woman has most definitely been the most awesome season of my life thus far. Being at Liberty, we see many couples who appear to be Siamese twins and seem to require each other for tasks as simple as opening a can of pop. Okay, that was a little bit of sarcasm, but SERIOUSLY though, some of the couples here are a bit obnoxious. I admit, there are times that I wonder when/if God is going to bring someone into my life who will be my partner in bringing Him glory by our life together, but I'm MORE than willing to wait for His timing. Even though I don't know him,I pray for him and can't wait to be with him, but I know that he is going to be more than worth the wait. On the other hand, some people around here act like singleness is the freaking Bubonic Plague. I can not count the number of Facebook statuses that I've seen that complain about being single, wondering where all the good guys/girls are, wondering when God is going to drop prince charming on their front porch, and are a festering mire of self pity. Singleness is not a waiting season, a curse, or a time to party hardy. Singleness is a gift packed with purpose, potential, fun, and beauty. God does not create seasons of our life designated for sitting around on your rump waiting for Mr./Mrs. Right to come sweep you off your feet. Our purpose in life is to love God with ALL of our heart, mind, and soul. We were created to serve Him, be used by Him, and reach the world with the message of His Son, forgiveness, redemption, and hope. Why wait, what better time than now? No spouse, no children, and a God to who is willing to use as much of you as you are willing to give Him. Singleness is truly a gift.
5. Have fun, be crazy, live a little :)
Tonight was one of the most fun times I've had in a long time. I got to hang out with one my best friends, Lena, and we had a BLAST. Just hanging out, talking about life, Jesus, and doing crazy things. Jesus has blessed me with wonderful, FUN friends. Don't let work become such a large part of your life that you forget to enjoy the season you're in. Hang out with friends, do crazy things, live a little.
There are many other things I could write, but I'm getting sleepy and you're probably getting tired of reading this, so I'm going to peace out. Thank you for reading my hodge podge of a blog :)
